I was walking circles around the front drive for exercise when I noticed this little green caterpillar in the middle of the road. Obviously, it had just fallen from the trees above. Immediately it began inching its way along … trying to get out of the middle of the drive and over to the safety along the edge.
Every time I came around for another loop on my walk, I made sure to watch out for the little green caterpillar so as not to step on it.
It was definitely in danger’s way … in the middle of the drive … right where a car could squash it. I was glad it was early morning, so no worry of cars coming through.
This little green caterpillar had a long way to go … not only to get out of the middle of the drive and over to safety … but a long way to go before it could reach its ultimate goal – that of being a butterfly. This little caterpillar must first make it through a long cold season of winter.
I’ve been exploring the topic this week of making new friends / developing new relationships. A few weeks ago, hubby and I had the opportunity to attend a “Meet & Greet.” I was surprised to discover that everyone else at the “Meet & Greet” was brand new to the area … having just recently moved: from Milwaukee, from Boston, from Memphis, Albuquerque, Portland, etc. …
Each person at the “Meet & Greet” was lonely and new and looking for friendship.
It’s hard when we are shaken from our comfy leafy canopy, just like the little green caterpillar … and we find ourselves landing in unfamiliar territory. What am I doing here?? Where do I even go from here??
The little green caterpillar could pick any direction to go. There was greenery and bushes all around. The caterpillar just needed to start moving!
Later that afternoon I noticed that the little green caterpillar was gone. I’m pretty sure it had made it to some bushes and was busy finding somewhere to build its chrysalis … in order to “hang on” through the next 9 months of cold and grey and rain (and wind and sleet and snow).
The same is true with us. God shakes us from our “comfort zone” … and we wind up in “new territory” having to “start over again.” It’s daunting, but we can’t just sit still in one place. That would be like the little caterpillar sitting still in the middle of the drive. We need to start moving. Pick a direction and start heading that way. Find a new “social circle” … then, just like the little caterpillar, we’re going to need to “hang on” … and weather the “Freeze.”
In the Pacific Northwest, it takes a full year to really get to know people … to get past the surface layer of mere polite cordiality, and make it to the deeper layer of true friendship. It takes a full year. Without fail.
Starting a new job at a new company … it takes a full year of building trust; of proving yourself day in and day out before your coworkers will begin to view you as “one of their own.”
Trying to get plugged in to a new church … it will take a full year. Showing up faithfully, proving you truly are who you say you are, building trust.
When it comes to developing new friendships/relationships in the Pacific Northwest, it’s all about building trust. Trust must be built! Only when trust is built will people open up their lives and be willing to share those sacred places of their heart, which is the foundation of all deep friendship/relationship. Only when trust is built!
And it takes time to build trust!
It takes a long time to build trust!
It takes patience to break through the “Freeze.”
The fact that it takes a full year to break through to true authentic friendship/relationship has been a known fact for hubby and me. It’s simply a fact of life. We’ve never thought anything of it. Every time hubby has changed jobs, it’s always taken a full year, then, the breakthrough. Every single time.
I did not know there was a term for this until a few years ago, when a new friend (recently transplanted from Ohio) was venting her frustration to me about the “Seattle Freeze.” I’ve lived in the area for years, yet I had never heard the term before.
But I will admit … it’s true.
News articles online will claim that it is due to the endless cold grey rainy weather, which causes people to become withdrawn. Perhaps this might have something to do with it. But no matter what the reason … the way to break through the “Freeze” is to build trust. Plain and simple.
And it takes time to build trust … a full year, to be precise.
But once you build that trust, the friendships and relationships are true and deep!
Just like the little green caterpillar will be weathering out the freeze of this coming winter, so also hubby and I will be weathering out the “Freeze” as well for our foreseeable future … trusting that God will bring the beauty of friendship/relationship on the other side.
It takes patience … patience to break through the “Freeze.”
