Last night as I was in the kitchen fixing dinner, little Jr. deer came wandering by. He is definitely in the adolescent teenager phase! The last few times I have seen him, he has been venturing off on his own, exploring away from mom. This time was no exception.
With no hesitation at all, he moseyed very purposefully, all by himself, along the side yard, pausing to take a look at me in the window. Then he kept right on going … around the corner, to the back of the house.
Where is the mom??
Oh … there she is … way over there by the apple tree. She browsed over and took some time to munch on a few low hanging green apples.
Jr. deer never came back around. Where did he go?
I went over to look out the back windows of the house … and Jr. deer was waaay over at the far end of the back yard, underneath the big leaf maple. Mama better keep an eye on him, or he’ll wander off completely.
Oh, here she comes! I’m sure she would have enjoyed munching green apples a little longer. But … she’s got to keep up with Jr.
Such is parenting.
Off into the woods the two wandered together. (there is a water-hole back in that corner … I’m pretty sure they were headed there to get a drink)
Watching the mama deer trying to keep up with her enthusiastic, energetic, exploring little teenager deer reminded me a lot of how I often feel trying to keep up with my two kids. (Ha!)
This is the way it is supposed to be. Our kids are supposed to be enthusiastic, energetic, and exploring!
As we parent our kids through the different stages of “gaining independence” … they don’t need us to always be hovering, controlling, protecting. They need space … and freedom to venture out on their own and see what the world is like.
It’s exhausting. It’s exhausting to let our kids explore, take chances, take risks … as they learn how to navigate the world in which they live.
But they’re going to be out there in that big bad world sooner than we know! And they need to be ready and prepared!
And so we let go … and in turn, we let them go.
It brought to mind a poem I wrote back in 2005, entitled – This Moment in Time.
Here is an excerpt:
This moment in time is brief,
it will pass;
for time has a way
of slipping by fast.
… … …
Each day the kids are changing;
they’re growing so fast.
Before I know it,
this moment in time will be past.
They’re trying to figure out
what life’s all about.
They’re becoming their own persons
and beginning to branch out.
They need guidance with wisdom;
freedom to fail;
opportunities to learn
how to do a job well.
They need hard times to teach them
to persevere.
They need to be around others,
without mom always near.
It’s hard to let go;
and give responsibility;
Let them make their own choices
and be unique.
It’s exhausting to let them
do things on their own;
and work on character skills
they’ll need when they’re grown.
… … …
This is what it looks like as our kids gain independence.
