It’s blackberry season! I love to pick blackberries! Whenever I head out to pick blackberries, I always wear my lightweight rain jacket to protect my arms. These final days of summer are still really warm, yet my lightweight rain jacket is just light enough … and breathable … to work well.
Tramping into the blackberry briars I’m met with tough woody canes covered in huge thorns … like in the background photo. These I try to avoid completely! Nevertheless, they still grab hold of my jacket and hang on tight as I try to pull free. They grab hold of my hair and refuse to let go.
To pick blackberries means to be right in the middle of thorny briars and brambles. Every reach of the hand to pick berries is in some way a careful maneuver so as not to get scratched. Yet, scratches result anyway.
Blackberry picking is a lot like dealing with an impossible relationship.
The impossible relationship is tough and covered with huge “thorny” issues, which would be wise to avoid! Interacting with the impossible relationship is tedious, as we try to duck and dodge the “thorny” sticking points.
We carefully pick our way through the impossible relationship, all the while the “thorny” points grab hold and try to hang on tight … as we simultaneously try to work ourselves free and into “safer” space.
Being in an impossible relationship is to be right in the middle of thorny briars and brambles. Each reach of the hand in friendship and relationship is a careful maneuver so as not to get “scratched” by the other person. Yet, “scratches” still result anyway.
We all have some sort of impossible relationship which is “thorny” and difficult.
Just as my lightweight rain jacket protects me whenever I head into the blackberry briars, so also it is our safe and caring relationships, which we have with “safe” people, that protects us as we deal with the impossible relationships in our lives.
Our safe and caring relationship accepts us as we are … and does not criticize or judge or tear us down. Our safe and caring relationship is “breathable” … not heavy or weighty or overbearing or demanding. Our safe and caring relationship gives us grace for our mistakes and mess-ups and difficult days.
It is this safe and caring relationship which “covers” and “protects” us as we face the “thorny” impossible relationship. We are covered with love and acceptance … so the briars of rudeness, indifference, criticism, and hurt can’t get through to “scratch” quite as bad. Sure, some scratches still occur. But on the whole, the love and acceptance of the safe and caring relationship protects our heart.
Let your relationships with those in your life be like a lightweight rain jacket … be a safe covering of acceptance and love.
A great relationship protects!
