As green beans grow, they stretch … and they reach!
The stretching, growing, reaching end of green bean runners are very tender and pliable. This gives them the ability to twist, bend, curl, and wrap around things … as they seek to grow up some sort of support structure.
However, once the green bean runner has twisted and wrapped itself around support, it then becomes firm, rigid, and unbending … in order to be able to carry the weight of the green beans which will soon be following.
Children are like green bean runners.
As they grow, they are stretching … and reaching!
Stretching! Their minds are tender and pliable as they twist their thoughts around new concepts … as they bend their minds to understand new information. As they wrap their minds around how the world around them works! As they curl to conform to cultural and societal norms.
Reaching!
They are reaching out for independence.
They are reaching out to explore the world around them.
They are reaching out to discover all the many things they can do in life.
They are reaching out for freedom to make their own choices and decisions.
Here you can see a green bean runner in my garden. It is growing … and reaching.
However, as you can see, it is not growing and reaching in the right direction. It is trying to reach over and join the tomatoes. It can tell there is support over that way.
But a tomato cage is designed to provide support for growing tomatoes … not green beans.
This green bean runner will not be as healthy or as productive if it’s all tangled up amongst the tomatoes.
This green bean runner needs me to help it grow in the right direction.
And so … I gently take this tender, pliable green bean runner and I weave it back through the support structure which hubby and I put in place specifically for the green beans.
Now it can stretch … and reach … and produce lots of green beans!
What would happen if I was not paying attention to the garden? What if I did not notice that this green bean runner was headed in the wrong direction?
In a very short amount of time, this green bean runner would have become firm, rigid, and unbending. And at that point I would not be able to re-direct it at all. There would no longer be any give in the runner. It would be fixed permanently in its position.
Well … what if I decided to force the green bean runner back toward the green bean support structure? It might be firm, rigid, and unbending … but I’m stronger … and I’m going to make it grow the way I want it to grow!
The green bean runner would break. Plain and simple.
Once the green bean runner becomes firm and rigid, there is no more bending, shaping, or guiding it. It is what it is.
This right here is what parenting looks like.
Our children are green bean runners. As they grow, they are tender and pliable. We can teach, and train, and guide them as they stretch and reach! We can help them grow up the support structure we have put in place for them.
As they stretch and reach and grow … up the support structure we have put in place for them … they become strong and stable young people. They start to produce fruit. The way they have grown up the support structure holds them solid and stable as an abundant harvest hangs from their lives.
They are strong, stable, and healthy! With lives overflowing with lots of green beans!
But what if we are not paying attention to our parenting?? … what if we are just “letting life happen” without giving it much thought?? Then our children’s “green bean runners” will grow every which direction!
If we aren’t actively, diligently paying attention to our children’s needs and growth, we won’t notice when they begin to grow in a direction which is not healthy for them. We won’t notice when they get all tangled up in places which are unhealthy for them.
Or if we do notice … eventually … and then try to force our children back in a different direction … it will be too late.
Once our children’s “green bean runners” become firm, rigid, and unbending … if we try to force them, it will break the relationship!
Children are like green bean runners! Parent wisely! Diligently guide those tender young growing runners up a support structure. Be alert! … aware! … observant!
Parent wisely … and let your children grow and reach for the sky!
